John Mayer says he has a funny dating track record (update: video)

You know how I said I was going to give John Mayer a pass this week because he might have bought a homeless guy a meal? Yeah. I might have to retract that sh-t. Because John Mayer is back to giving douchey interviews. I’m so confused! Should I take a pass on this hilarious stupidity, or should I just enjoy, as I usually do? I think you know the answer.

First, let me say this – I don’t actually consider John Mayer to be a dumb guy. He’s not. He’s pretty smart… he’s just not as smart as he thinks he is. That’s my biggest problem with Mayer: he thinks he’s a f-cking genius, and he’s not. He just some douche with more brains than most. Okay, now onto the interview – Mayer was on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, probably promoting his new album, Battle Studies. Of course the conversation came to Mayer’s personal life, and I’m honestly surprised Mayer didn’t pull out a bullhorn to tell every little detail about who he’s screwing and why:

John Mayer says he is taking a break from dating.

“I’m not dating,” the singer, 32, says on The Ellen DeGeneres Show Tuesday. “I don’t know if you know this, but I have sort of a funny track record. Which is actually not that strange given my age. I’m a little freaked out right now about it, to be honest.”

Adds Mayer, “I’m just going to let time pass and just do my thing.”

This past year, Mayer made headlines for his on-and-off romance with Jennifer Aniston. He has also romanced Jessica Simpson, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Minka Kelly, among others. But he isn’t complaining.

“For some reason, whoever I date has been famous for a while,” he says. “I can’t sit here and be like, ‘Oh please, let me live my life in private with this famous person who’s been around for 15 years.’ I have to figure out what are the things that I ask for and sign up for, in terms of cause and effect. The last thing you want is to see me bashing my head going, ‘I’m shocked that I’m being followed right now!'”

At the end of the day, Mayer insists, “I have a good heart. I think I may have gotten lost a couple of times, but so does everybody. I’m just going to hunker down. 2010 is a peaceful year for me, no matter what I do.”

[From Us Weekly]

Eh. A “good heart”? I can’t help it, I think the guy’s a closet case who treats women like sh-t because he’s so self-loathing. But I do think it’s hysterical that he uses words like “funny,” “strange” and “freaked out” in regards to his dating history. Note this too – Mayer says he isn’t “dating” anyone, but he’s either lying (shocking!) or he doesn’t consider what he’s doing “dating”. Which means that Jennifer Aniston and Jessica Simpson were probably just bangin’ him and they were like “No really, we aren’t dating, please don’t tell anyone we’re dating.”

By the way, I think Mayer’s guitar has unfortunately taken the place of a girlfriend/boyfriend. Take the bitch out to dinner first, Mayer!

Update by Celebitchy: Here’s the video of Mayer talking to Ellen about dating. That part starts at about 4:30. The video below is just a segment. Here’s a link to Part 1 and Part 2 of the full interview, and here’s a link to Mayer performing “Who Says”.

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